ending a day the same way it began

15 hours later crossed legs on
the floor in the shower cold water cold tiles
head in hands wondering what went wrong and
will it ever go right.

the owl of minerva

back at uni.
lectures
and tutorials
and readings
and assignments
and waiting
and motivation
and sleeping in.

disappointments.

so what the fuck are you going to do kid?

Last night I slept a lot. Probably like 11 hours or a little more. I have this shitty sleep rhythm going on where I'll stay up late and get up early for a day or two, then I'll pass out for 11 or 12 hours and catch up. Basically I hate sleep because it's a waste of a good day. I resent missing out on that time.

Standfast practice last night was pretty good, we'd had a couple of weeks off and that was probably good. We didn't even fight with each other last night. We also put together a new song that I'd been working on at home and I think the guys were kinda into it. I was happy with how it sounded.

Writing songs this time around has been a slow process. When we first started on the new tracks (7 of which we've already recorded with Jay) they came out so fast we almost couldn't keep up. We'd come to jam each week with all the stuff we hadn't had time to do the week before. I guess we were averaging about 1 song every practice and we were pretty pumped on how they were sounding. Then we recorded the demos and since then it's been more of a struggle. We have two done now but they still need some polishing. I don't really know why. I think it's going to be a pretty cool record when we're done.

Listening to Modern Life Is War. They're so sincere. Like you listen to it and go 'man, these guys really mean it.' That's what I want to sound like.

still rattling at the chains on the gates of the world

the daily grind
is really getting me down.

rent
bills
payslips
days off
early mornings
late nights
savings accounts
saving up.

just to clear the air

Everybody should be a vegetarian.

The bottom line: animals suffer. there's no justification for ignoring that suffering to satisfy human desires. It's absolutely possible to live a long and healthy life without eating animals, and that's what you ought to do.

As if that wasn't reason enough:
The world's cattle alone consume a quantity of food equal to the caloric needs of 8.7 billion people—more than the entire human population on Earth.

Yes you read that right. Ignoring the billions of chickens, pigs, sheep, fish, and other animals raised by humans for food or clothing, raising cows for food uses more food than would be needed to feed the entire world. Farm animals turn large amounts of protein (in the form of grains) into small amounts of meat protein. Depending on the species, livestock consume between 5 and 20 times more protein than they yield.

Go veg.

these dreams will be my anchor, these dreams will be the death of me

all i've wanted since i can remember really wanting anything
is to make my life in music.

nothing was ever so important to me.

in a neon sign i am born again

this is a place for me to write things that are better out than in.